margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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