the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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