At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
