I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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