That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
