Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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