Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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