who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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