Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
We need a shit load of segways right now
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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