I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
