who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
