miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
