bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
