Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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