I want to stick my p in your. b.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
