It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
