My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
