Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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