he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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