I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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