She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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