Heybabeimwearingurpanties
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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