well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
