I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
