He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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