the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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