I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
