'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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