The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize