You just made me feel so damn special
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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