so that wasnt chicken after all
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
