remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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