Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
