I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
