Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
