Buhtt sex?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
