also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
