I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
