Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
