I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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