This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
