Having a random hookup so left but love u
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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