If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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