Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
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