I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
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