Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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