just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
