I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
