so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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