PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
the room spins SO much faster in panama
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
